I Push my fingers into my eyes…

It’s the only thing that slowly stops the ache. But it’s made of all the things I have to take.

I just realized that I didn’t take my meds this morning.  I realized about the same time that I made the conscious decision to not take them tonight.  I just didn’t feel like it.  I walked right by the bottles,  but couldn’t be bothered to pick them up.  

I have screamed until my veins collapsed. 

This is a bad idea,  isn’t it?  I don’t care.  It’s what I want.  

If the pain goes on,  I’m not gonna make it.   All I’ve got,  all I’ve got is insane.  

Let’s see how long I can go before my brainpan goes nuclear! 

I’ve wished for this.  I’ve bitched at that.  I’ve left behind this little fact.  You cannot kill what you did not create. 

Detox Day 1.


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